PENN STATE DECLINES LARRY BROWN'S INTEREST IN TAKING BASKETBALL COACHING POSITION

In other news from State College, St. Francis Parish turns down an offer from the Pope to preach this weekend, telling him, "We have a kids' Mass scheduled"

MOCKINGBURGH POLL: WHAT DO YOU THINK OF HINES WARD'S WIN ON 'DANCING WITH THE STARS'?

87% - An awesome win for him and Steelers Nation

13% - Doesn't quite take the sting out of losing the Super Bowl

STEELERS FANS GIVE 'DWTS' JUDGE LEN GOODMAN A SEVEN FOR HIS TOWEL-TWIRLING SKILLS

"I don't know how he can criticize Hines' quick step when he can't even twirl the Terrible Towel," one fan grouses. "There was no attack, and his frame wasn't that great."

MOCKINGBURGH POLL: THE PA HEALTH SECRETARY'S EGG SANDWICH

When Eli Avila, Pennsylvania's new Secretary of Health, had a dispute with a diner over an egg sandwich, he initiated an inspection of the restaurant and urged state workers not to eat there. What do you think of this?

13% - He may have overreacted just a little, little bit

87% - The governor should tell him he's toast

ABC'S FALL LINEUP TO FEATURE STEELERS PLAYERS IN EVERY SERIES

"We're not stupid," ABC entertainment chief says; advertising slots sell out within 15 minutes


LOS ANGELES - Building upon the success of Hines Ward's appearance on 'Dancing with the Stars,' the ABC network announced today that all Fall shows will feature Steelers players.

"We are not stupid," said ABC Entertainment president Paul Lee, "even though all of last year's Fall show ended up being cancelled. We more or less lucked out by having Hines on one of our shows, and the ratings have been great. We have seen the light and are going to take full advantage."

Lee acknowledged that the ongoing NFL lockout aids the network. "The players are just sitting around looking for things to do anyway. And obviously if there are no games, it hurts CBS and FOX a lot more."

Here are a few highlights of the upcoming season:

'WipeOut' - A special episode will feature Baltimore Ravens players. "Our original thought was to have Troy Polamalu on, but we had him run the course and there was no obstacle that could defeat him. But we think Steelers fans will really, really enjoy seeing the Ravens getting hit in the gut with giant boxing gloves and falling off the big balls."

'Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution' - "The Big Snack [Casey Hampton] will be Jamie's greatest challenge yet," Lee said. "We already have some hilarious footage of Jamie running around dressed like a tomato, and Casey comes along and just crushes him."

'Castle' - Ben Roethlisberger will guest star, "as a victim, for a change," Lee says.

The general manager of WTAE, Pittsburgh's ABC affiliate, is thrilled. "This will be great for both our entertainment and news programming," station manager Bob Brenneman says. "But we just don't have enough time in existing news programs for all the shameless stories we'll be doing. So watch for expanded morning, noon, and evening news programming on WTAE, plus a nightly wrap-up that will take the place of 'Nightline' in Pittsburgh.

"Nobody ever watches 'Nightline' in our market. They never talk football."

JEROME BETTIS INSISTS HE CALLED 'HEADS' DURING 'DANCING WITH THE STARS' COIN TOSS

IT'S ELECTION DAY IN PENNSYLVANIA. WILL YOU BE VOTING TODAY?

13% - Yes

87% - I've been voting for weeks! You mean I have to do it again?

MOCKINGBURGH POLL: THE 'DANCING WITH THE STARS' DISPUTED COIN TOSS

After winning their preliminary rounds, Hines Ward and Kym Johnson were set to face off in an instant cha-cha against Chelsea and Mark. During the coin toss, Hines called tails and was awarded the choice, but then it switched to Mark and Chelsea's choice. They chose to go second, and ultimately won the fifteen bonus points.

What did you think of this controversial call?

13% - It's the Detroit Lions/Steelers Thanksgiving Day game all over again

87% - Hines and Kym won't need the bonus points - we've got their backs

STEELERS FANS HOLD CANDLELIGHT VIGIL FOR KYM JOHNSON

Hines Ward had asked fans to "show her some love" after neck injury

NATO BOMBS LIBYAN CAPITAL AFTER GADDAFI MAKES APPEARANCE

Leader later re-emerges to say, "I'm all right"

WITH END OF WORLD PREDICTED, WOMAN DEBATES WHETHER TO BOTHER WORKING

"If the world is ending May 21 like they say, why don't we just go out drinking till then?" gardener Susie Messner says. "That's a better use of my time."

SHRILL-VOICED STADIUM VENDOR DIES

Medical examiner speculates that the shock of the Pirates being above .500 this late into the season was too much for Kenny Geidel

AMERICAN WOMEN MIFFED AT HINES WARD FOR SAYING THEY ALWAYS DEMAND ENGAGEMENT RINGS

But they're not so miffed that they would turn one down from him

MOCKINGBURGH POLL: WHAT WAS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE PART OF MONDAY'S 'DANCING WITH THE STARS'?

13% - The make-up on Ralph Macchio

87% - Not enough shots of Troy Polamalu in the audience

STINK BUG INVASION MAKES PITTSBURGHERS NOSTALIC FOR THE DAYS WHEN LADYBUGS WERE THE BIG PROBLEM

PRESIDENT OBAMA ORDERS RASHARD MENDENHALL TO GET HIS HEAD EXAMINED

DIDN'T GET TO READ SUNDAY'S POST-GAZETTE? HERE'S A SUMMARY!

1. Bin Laden is dead.

2. It's been raining a lot.

HOMELESS MAN ACCUSED OF MAKING HUNDREDS OF LEWD PHONE CALLS

Police were led to suspect by reports of a man begging for quarters and women's phone numbers

MOCKINGBURGH POLL: HINES WARD'S FEMALE COMPANION

Early Thursday morning, Hines Ward was detained by California police for riding in a car that had been reported stolen. The female companion with him had earlier forgotten where she parked, reported it stolen, found it, but then did not cancel the police report. What do you think of the female companion?



13% - It's a mistake anyone could make

87% - She might be too stupid for ya, Hines

MOCKINGBURGH POLL: WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE 9/11 TRUTHER?

A) Charlie Sheen

B) Will Smith

C) Rashard Mendenhall

WAS HINES WARD PART OF RAID THAT KILLED BIN LADEN?

'DWTS' references to 'The Silent Assassin' and previous appearance in Naval uniform may provide clues; Rashard Mendenhall doubtful

HINES WARD GETS CRITICISM FROM 'DWTS' JUDGES, STILLS ENDS UP IN FIRST PLACE

The man can do no wrong!

PASSENGERS FIND NEW WAYS TO AVOID AIRLINE BAGGAGE FEES