"They give us what we want when we want it, and we are laughing at them the entire time," spokescat says
LOS ANGELES - Pets believe that they control their households and are only slightly worried about Americans catching on to the situation, according to a new poll from Blogger! Public Media.
"Overall, and across all species, animals believe they have the upper hand," said pollster Terri Madonna. "It's not an unexpected result - when people are catering to all your needs and you don't have to do anything other than look and act cute, you're going to think you're in charge."
Animals concur. Aggie, a white golden retriever, moved into her new home just a few weeks ago. "My so-called owner expected me to sleep by his fireplace while he worked, but I don't want to. Did he send me away? No! Not only do I go where I want, I have my toys all over the place, too. He is so gullible."
According to the poll, cats are most contemptuous of owners, as are many dogs. But only a bare majority of rabbits feel secure in their homes. "We're prey, so we always assume the worst," said Penny, a brown bunny in a Pennsylvania home. "I'm pretty sure I hit the bunny jackpot with my owner, but I keep testing her anyway. I wake her up at 5:00 am, I bite her every so often, and she still brings me nice salads and treats. I know I should be grateful, but I can't help but think she must be a little bit stupid. I know I wouldn't put up with her if the roles were reversed."
