I AM GETTING WAY TOO MANY BLOG READERS FROM CLEVELAND

COMMENTARY - Matthew 13:57 says, "A prophet is not without honor, save in his own country." So it is with Mockingburgh, which lately has gotten ten times more hits from Cleveland than from our fair city.

This all started with my ongoing coverage of the Steelers, and the controversial call at the end of the Pittsburgh-Miami game. On that same weekend, the Browns beat Super Bowl champion New Orleans Saints. While you'd think the fan message boards would be celebrating that fact, they were more obsessed with the referee's call for the Steelers. Someone linked to my photo of Steelers fans lining the streets to welcome Gene Steratore home, and - voila - lots o' hits from Cleveland.

Don't let this happen again, Pittsburgh. You can do better than Cleveland. We beat them on the football field, and we can beat them on web traffic, too.

LOCAL KIDS WARN AGAINST HANDING OUT CARROTS AS HALLOWEEN TREATS

PITTSBURGH -- A coalition of youngsters from all parts of the area warned of "severe consequences" if local residents hand out carrots instead of candy this weekend. The fun-sized portions of "Scarrots" were dreamed up by carrot producers and marketing executives as a healthy alternative to chocolates, candy corn, and popcorn balls for Halloween trick-or-treating.

"Yuck. Let me repeat - yuck," said Bobby Brenneman, a 12-year-old from Wilmerding who spoke for a group of boys and girls with him at a press conference today. "It figures our parents came up with this idea. They got candy when they were little, and they even say people handed out full-size bars then. But when it's our turn, they want to change the rules."

When asked what would happen to people who give out the vegetables, Brenneman was direct. "We'll be back later that night," he said. "You can expect your house to be TP'd, and I wouldn't rule out burning bags of poo at your front door." Several girls standing behind Bobby covered their mouths and giggled at the mention of the word "poo."

Other frowned-upon treats, according to the coalition, are toothbrushes, pennies, and apples, "unless they are candied or caramel-covered," Bobby continued. "All we want is our fair share of candy. Drop treats into our bags and we'll be on our way. And if you want us to leave you alone all year, you might want to consider full-size bars."

REPORT: STEELERS' CHARTER PLANE WAS HELD ON RUNWAY WHILE DOLPHINS' LAWYERS TRIED TO OVERTURN RULING

"Tomlin may have had the buses warmed up, but he forgot about the plane," attorney says


MIAMI - A report on Blogger! Sports claims that South Florida air traffic control and attorneys for the Miami Dolphins conspired to keep the Steelers' plane from departing while the lawyers tried to file briefs with the federal courts.

A controversial call near the end of the game gave the ball back to the Steelers despite a Roethlisberger fumble and apparent recovery by the Dolphins. The Steelers kicked a field goal on the next play, resulting in the final score of 23-22. In the locker room, Steelers coach Mike Tomlin had his players hurry to board the buses and leave the stadium before the ruling could be changed.

"It's outrageous," Dolphin attorney R. Carmen Angina of Angina & Rover says. "You had a Pittsburgh native [referee Gene Steratore] making a call for his hometown team. It's a clear conflict of interest, and the courts should have overturned it. But by the time we were retained, we had trouble locating a judge, and the air traffic controllers ran out of reasons to keep them here."

"We're still thinking of filing a lawsuit for infliction of emotional distress, so anyone who feels aggrieved should contact our law firm."

Dolphins' management and coaching staff is already taking steps to address the problems that arose last Sunday. "We'll be prepared at future home games," head coach Tony Sparano said today. "We'll have our lawyers on hand from now on, and we might set up our own court like they have in the Eagles' stadium."

"Or maybe we'll just find a few players who can score touchdowns. We get in the end zone on both of those first two fumble recoveries, and all this would be moot."

STEELERS FANS LINE THE STREETS TO WELCOME HOME REFEREE GENE STERATORE

STEELERS WINNERS AND LOSERS: WEEK 7

Winners: Hines Ward, Emmanuel Sanders, the guys in the replay booth, the two officials who live in Pittsburgh

Losers: Whiny Dolphins fans, the Steelers' pass rush, Ben Roethlisberger

MOCKINGBURGH POLL: WHAT'S THE WORST THING ABOUT THIS PHOTOGRAPH?

A) Knee socks not a good look on adult women.

B) In a sea of bad fashion choices, the black mesh/pink bra combo stands out.

C) The guy.

D) The NFL's attempt to make up for objectifying women by promoting breast cancer awareness.

E) All of the above.

PITTSBURGH TOP AMERICAN CITY FOR CARDINALS

Baltimore #1 for orioles, Toronto leads internationally in blue jays